小早川伸木の恋

Watched a new Japanese Serial.

The story revolves around a Doctor who have a very suspicious and insecure wife, and a lovely young daughter. The wife suspects him everytime he speaks to a lady, any lady.

Things got worst and of cos divorce came into the picture.

The man wanted the divorce. He have enough of the situation and the wife's behavior.

The wife refused the divorce. Even went to the extend of getting a lawyer to NOT get divorce. Because of the daughter.

So basically, the daughter is the whole reason that the wife is hanging on to the marriage and do not want her to grow up with a broken family.

Then, someone, (who came from a broken family) came into the picture and said this "It is unfair to your daughter if you let her be the reason for your decision. She do not want to grow up knowing that she is the cause of both your unhappiness to stay together. If she have a choice now, she will have you both make your own decision without having her as a factor. If a settlement(emotional, financial etc etc) can be reached between both the husband and wife, why must you let someone who have no decision making power be the cause? I came from a family with exactly the same problem. And I hated myself, because I am the cause of the unhappiness for my parents for the past 25 years."

Now, the point here is, when a huge thing like a divorce is on the horizon, we always see things from the husband or wife's perspective. Becos we have the towering command and control of our children and we must make the decision for them, cos we are always right. Now, the above paragraph shows another perspective.

The child's perspective.

As a child, growing up from a happy family with the right kind of communications between the parents are important.

It will be a different scenerio altogether, if growing up with 2 adults who do not share communications, happiness and closeness. A child can be brought up in a very right manner even if the parents are seperated. It's how you handle the child and explain things slowly, step by step.

Sometimes, we adults can be so "full of ourselves" when it comes to things that we call "adult" things. It's more like a human thing than "adult thing.

Please don't misunderstood me. I am NOT encouraging Divorce or whatever. It's just that this is an interesting perspective. I don't come from a broken family and I don't have any children, so I will never understand and should not make such comments? Maybe.

But think about it.

I am thinking from the perspective of the person who grew up hating himself, as he is the cause for his parents' unhappiness all these years.

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